Dear Children of America… It’s nearly Father’s Day. And the following Craigslist user likely speaks for all male parents around the world when he asks just one favor of you in honor of his parental holiday: Please think twice – nay, three times! – before deciding you NEED to have a certain item for your backyard. Especially when said item will be put together by dear ol’ dad… and then never used again after the first 24 hours of excitement. Such was the case with the father who put up the Craigslist ad below, asking if anyone wants a trampoline kids begged and pleaded for. And then promptly ignored. Click to enlarge the photo and read the man’s hilariously bitter diatribe explaining why this is now for sale… What father out there cannot relate, right? It’s just another sign of being a parent… 11 Signs You’re a Parent 1. Potty Time What is it about going to the bathroom that acts as a Bat Signal for children, alarming them to your whereabouts and begging them to be your audience whilst you do your business?
Yesterday marked the tenth anniversary of one of the most oft-quoted cult comedies in recent memory. While the cast of Napoleon Dynamite has experienced mixed results with regard to their acting careers, the film itself remains a beloved, quirky classic. And since the movie primarily lives on in the form of all-occasion quips like “You’re ruining everyone’s lives and eating all our steak!” we figured what better way to celebrate its decade of existence than with a list of Uncle Rico and company’s most memorable lines? 11 Hilarious Napoleon Dynamite Quotes! 1. Napoleon Dynamite: “Whatever I Feel Like!” “Whatever I feel like I wanna do! Gosh!” A line so classic even Kanye used it. And why did we make a list of eleven quotes on the movie’s tenth anniversary? Because we wanted to, gosh ! So jump into the gallery above to relive some of the funniest lines 2004’s surprise indie smash. When you’re done, treat yourself to some whole milk and Chapstick. You deserve it. While you may have watched the film obsessively when it first came out you might have forgotten about the pride with which Uncle Rico promises to throw a football “over them mountains;” the intimidation you felt when Rex threatened a roundhouse to the face; or Tina’s indignation at being called a “lard.” Will such a small budget film ever again find such a massive audience? We don’t know. All we can say for sure is that Napoleon Dynamite is not pretty much the worst movie ever made. The Cast of Napoleon Dynamite: Where Are They Now? 1. Jon Heder Heder played the title character in Napoleon Dynamite. He’s continued to work consistently in the decade since, but has never recreated the succcess of his breakthrough film.
Taylor Swift has taken a major step forward in her acting career. The singer has landed a role in the film The Giver , a big screen version of the popular young adult novel by Louis Lowry. It’s unclear at the moment just what role Swift will take on, but it’s not unclear just how impressive a cast she’s joining. Brenton Thwaites – yes, rumored love interest Brenton Thwaites ! – will portray an individual selected for life service as the Receiver of Memories, while the title character will be played by Jeff Bridges. Others on board include Katie Holmes, Alexander Skarsgard and Meryl Streep. The Giver will start filming October 7 on South Africa and be released on August 15, 2014.
Groundhog Day 2013 is upon us. Tens of thousands braved temperatures in the single digits last night and this morning in the Weather Capitol of the World, Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania. The occasion? That magical moment when Punxsutawney Phil rises from Gobbler’s Knob, accompanied by his tuxedo-clad handlers, to predict winter’s duration? Will it be six more weeks of snow, wind and cold before the respite of spring? Will a reprieve come sooner? Only Phil and his shadow can say for sure. And he has, just moments ago: NO SHADOW! “Not a shadow to be found. Spring is sprung. RIP Winter! #earlyspring!” That’s according to Phil’s official Twitter (gotta love modern technology)! It’s only the 16th time in 127 years that Punxsutawney Phil , who emerged from his burrow to find overcast conditions in Western Pa., has decreed such a thing. So will the great prognosticator be vindicated by a milder February/March? Debatable at best. But the accuracy of his prediction is secondary, of course. The real point of Groundhog Day is a silly excuse to get out in the elements and submit to the power, mystery and majesty of nature is what it’s all about. It’s basically humans throwing up our hands and declaring we’re not in control … and a big excuse to stay up all night drinking outside in frigid conditions. And recite Groundhog Day quotes . That movie’s hilarious.
Emily VanCamp has reportedly signed on for her first major movie role. The (gorgeous!) Revenge star will portray the female lead in Captain America: The Winter Soldier , Movie Fanatic reports, although the actual identity of her character remains under wraps. Rumors abound, however, that VanCamp will take on the role of Sharon Carter, the niece of Hayley Atwell’s Peggy Carter. The Captain America sequel hits theaters on April 4 of next year. It returns Chris Evans as the Patriotic title character and will also feature Sebastian Stan, Scarlett Johansson, Cobie Smulders, Frank Grillo, Toby Jones, and Samuel L. Jackson.
Fire up the Bat -signal: Christopher Nolan ‘s The Dark Knight Rises has a home video street date of December 3, which means Christmas is coming early for the kids, the action fans, the Bat-fans, pretty much all grown adults, Christian Bale heads, Tom Hardy ites, Nolanazis , Joseph Gordon-Levitt ‘s transmedia empire, Furries who count Anne Hathaway’s Catwoman getup, freeclimbing enthusiasts, and those Warner Home Video suits awaiting their piles of cash. Mark your calendars! [ Coming Soon ]
Robert Downey, Jr. is certainly an It boy at the moment after a summer of Avengers (and more on the way) as well as his current project, Iron Man 3 . Now it appears that he and Jude Law are ready to take on another installment of Sherlock Holmes , but Law said that while the pair are into the idea of a return to the eccentric British detective saga, “but Downey’s a busy boy…” Theoretically, Warner Bros. would be into a third match-up as well. The first installment in which Downey plays the title character, while Law takes on the role of Dr. John Watson, pulled in a massive $209 million-plus – and that was just in the U.S. The 2011 follow-up (both directed by Guy Ritchie incidentally) still cashed in with an impressive nearly $187 million domestically (and well-over a half-billion dollars worldwide). So will it happen or not? Jude Law gave some insight, as reported by Metro in the U.K. “There’s certainly talk of it and I know there’s a script being played around with, but Downey’s a busy boy and I’m a busy boy so we’ll see,” he said. “But we want to [do another one]. We’re a very happy team and we have a lot of fun and we also think there’s still a lot of legs in the duo.” Apparently Iron Man 3 writer Drew Pearce was tapped to complete a script for the possible third installment. Law is currently promoting his latest film, Anna Karenina where it debuted last at the Toronto International Film Festival. [Source: Metro ]
Brava to the dewy-cheeked Kristen Stewart , who opened Snow White and the Huntsman , the weekend’s number one movie, by swinging a sword and championing girl power without having to kiss a single vampire! (Those two hunky human suitors and the riveting fabulosity that was Charlize Theron didn’t hurt either.) Nice to see girls ruling while boys drooled over the box office — well, their male-driven movies ( Men in Black 3 , Avengers , Battleship ), anyway. Tell us what you saw this weekend as we go to the receipts! 1. Snow White and the Huntsman Gross: $56,255,000 (new) Screens: 3,773 (PSA: $14,910) Weeks: 1 Well, well, well. Stewart’s first big non- Twilight movie made a strong showing over the weekend, outdoing Men in Black 3 ’s debut with the one-two-three punch of KStew, Chris Hemsworth, and Charlize Theron. Coming in with the fourth biggest opening of the year, the dark fairytale soared on dazzling visuals even if audiences only gave it a “B” CinemaScore rating. 2. Men in Black 3 Gross: $29,300,000 ($112,300,000) Screens: 4,248 (PSA $6,897) Weeks: 2 (Change: -46.3%) Foreign tallies will help Will Smith and Co. get over their 46.3 percent drop-off – even at only $112 million domestically, the sci-fi threequel has topped $386 million globally, and counting. Still, it’s not quite time to get MIB4 in gear, seeing as the reported production budget was a whopping $225 million alone. 3. The Avengers Gross: $20,273,000 ($552,737,000) Screens: 3,670 (PSA: $5,524) Weeks: 5 (Change: -44.7%) $1.35 billion worldwide and counting. That is all. 4. Battleship Gross: $4,810,000 ($55,123,000) Screens: 3,144 (PSA $1,530) Weeks: 3 (Change: -56.5%) Say bye bye to Battleship as it continues sinking ever faster down the Top 10. Universal’s thanking their lucky stars for the foreign markets right about now, as domestic take has totally a paltry $55.1 million in three weeks. 5. The Dictator Gross: $4,725,000 ($50,835,000) Screens: 2,649 (PSA $1,784) Weeks: 3 (Change: -49.1%) Still just the third-best performing Sacha Baron Cohen movie to date. N/A Piranha 3DD Gross: $179,000 (new) Screens: 86 (PSA $2,081) Weeks: 1 Well, they tried . Kinda . [Figures via Box Office Mojo ]
Elizabeth Olsen looks modestly dressed in her Victorian-era full-length dresses and hats for her role in the erotic thriller Therese Raquin , which she is currently filming in Budapest, Hungary. Olsen plays the title character Therese Raquin in this project, directed by Charlie Stratton and also starring Harry Potter ‘s Tom Felton and Jessica Lange. Her character is apparently forced into a loveless marriage with her sickly cousin Camille, played by Fenton. Young, beautiful and sexually repressed, Therese casts off innocence for a sizzling affair with her husband’s best friend Laurent, played by Drive actor Oscar Isaac. Needless to say, her dress gets ripped off on numerous occasions, according to The Daily Mail , which featured a number of photos of Olsen on set. Lange plays Therese’s controlling aunt, Madame Raquin, and the story crescendos as Therese’s dalliances with Laurent produces disastrous outcomes. “Some of the film’s themes will include the subjects of imprisonment and punishment, temperament and the human animal,” noted The Daily Mail. Olsen, 23, won praise last year for her starring role in Sundance indie Martha Marcy May Marlene and she will be seen this week in the Jane Fonda and Catherine Keener starrer Peace, Love, & Misunderstanding , which opens Friday. [via Daily Mail ] [Photo credit: WENN.com]
This could be fun: “Gary Oldman has inked a deal to star opposite Joel Kinnaman in MGM’s remake of Robocop . Kinnaman ( The Killing ) plays the title character, a cop named Alex Murphy who is brought back from the brink of death and turned into a cyborg police officer. Oldman will play Norton, the scientist who creates Robocop and finds himself torn between the ideals of the machine trying to rediscover its humanity and the callous needs of a corporation.” [ THR ]
