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Woody Allen: Religions Are ‘Delusions to Keep Us Going’

Legendary filmmaker Woody Allen recognizes that religion makes people happier, but still views religious faith as a “delusion” worthy of the same respect afforded a fortune cookie. In an interview  published Sept. 15  to promote his upcoming movie, “You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger,” Allen told The New York Times, “This sounds so bleak when I say it, but we need some delusions to keep us going. And the people who successfully delude themselves seem happier than the people who can’t.”  “To me, there’s no real difference between a fortune teller or a fortune cookie and any of the organized religions,” Allen told reporter David Itzkoff. “They’re all equally valid or invalid, really. And equally helpful.” When asked whether he thought reincarnation was more plausible than the existence of God, Allen said, “Neither seems plausible to me. I have a grim, scientific assessment of it. I just feel, what you see is what you get.”   Like this article? Sign up for “Culture Links,” CMI’s weekly e-mail newsletter, by   clicking   here.

On CNN, Bill Maher Says Tea Party Has ‘No Policy Points,’ Obama Has No Domestic Terror on His Watch

It could be a real contest for which thing Bill Maher said on CNN’s Larry King Live was the most ridiculous. It began with the assertion “Christine O’Donnell, like all these tea baggers, has no plan, no agenda. No policy points. They have one advantage. They’re running against Democrats. That’s their big advantage.” But for a sheer lack of factual grasp, it might be this statement, that domestic terrorism has apparently vanished under Obama: “And by the way, Obama has been president for 20 months and there has not been an attack. Bush was president for nine months when we got hit. So on that score, he’s kept us safer.” Did Maher sleep through the Fort Hood mass murder, not to mention the failed attacks in New York and Detroit?   Larry King typically asked Maher about the “crazed fringe” on the right and their hatred of Obama. King never asked Maher about his own “crazed fringe” on the anti-Bush left suggesting the last president was a Nazi, a chimpanzee, and mentally ill or disabled:  KING: What do you make of this whole — the anti-Obama thing which has gotten kind of, in a sense, crazed? No, he wasn’t born here. He’s a Muslim. He is against America. What do you make of that fringe? MAHER: I was talking about it with Jay Leno last night. I suggested maybe he’s not even a mammal. He might be a werewolf, Larry. We don’t know that. KING: That’s right. We don’t know. MAHER: I mean it was bad enough when we had these people called the birthers who thought he was not born here. KING: They’re still around somewhere, though. MAHER: Many of them. Yes. No, they haven’t gone away. But I was saying last night that I’ve identified this new group and I’m calling them the churchers. KING: The churchers? MAHER: The churchers. They’re the people who don’t think that he is a Christian. They think he’s — KING: He’s the first president ever to issue a press release that he is. MAHER: He’s a secret Muslim, Larry. I guess you haven’t been paying enough attention. KING: Secret Muslim. MAHER: When I talked to him, he told me about his plan to use drinking water to sterilize white people. I get — whoops, I’ve said too much. KING: Oh my gosh. MAHER: No, it’s the — what’s really scary is that more people think he’s a Muslim now. KING: How did we get to this, though? MAHER: Well, you know, I have a theory that the Internet makes people stupider. And Also Fox News makes people stupider. You know the Pew group did a study recently and they found out that 10 years ago, Democrats, Republicans and independents basically got their news from the same sources, probably more from CNN, for example. Then we had this polarity. And now, you know, John Edwards said we have two Americas. We do have two Americas. We have the America that’s living in reality. The people who understand that Obama is a centrist liberal from Hawaii who is trying to dig us out of the hole we’re in. And then we have this other Fox/Matt Drudge/Rush Limbaugh reality where he is a Muslim sleeper cell, Manchurian candidate who was sent over by his Kenyan father imbibe — you hear — KING: What kind of intelligent person would believe that? MAHER: Intelligent person? Larry, we’re broadcasting in America. How ridiculous. Well, no, I don’t think intelligent people do believe it. But, you know, then we’re going to get into partisan bickering because more than half of Republicans agreed with the state that said Obama is trying to impose Islamic law on America. I mean that is a very radical thing to believe. And it’s more than half of Republicans. Not tea baggers. Not radicals. The mainstream Republican people. KING: Is there a racist tone in this? Is there — in other words, is this racist — is this inherent racism? Where’s it come from? MAHER: Does the Pope go to the bathroom in the woods? Yes, Larry, it’s extremely racist. I mean it’s so funny because the tea baggers, the one thing they hate is black people. For all Maher’s talk of “two realities,” he’s too arrogant to contemplate that he’s mangling the facts on the Tea Party or terrorism, or just smearing the entire Tea Party as racist. King let his buddy Bill Maher unspool a long soliloquy against the insanity of the entire prospective field of Republican presidential contenders about to assemble: MAHER: I cannot wait to see the Republican debates in 2012 when you think about who is going to be on that panel. Sarah Palin, Newt Gingrich, Haley Barbour, John Bolton, Tim Pawlenty, Mitt Romney. How are they going to out-fire breath each other? I mean where this rhetoric has gone to at this point? It’s only 2010. And we’re having Newt Gingrich, as we were talking about before, calling him an anti-colonial Luo tribesman. Luo tribesman. That’s the new Kenyan, Larry. And Kenyan, of course, was code for nigger. But that’s where they are. They can’t say it out loud. But that’s where this whole campaign is going to be. You asked about racism. It’s all about racism. They cannot fathom this idea that there is a black president. And that’s what they are going to fight about. The other thing about Sarah Palin is that if you read that “Vanity Fair” article this month, if you read the “Newsweek” cover story a few months ago where she was praying on the cover, she’s a true religious snot. I know people are saying, oh there goes, Bill Maher. He’s always talking about religion. Well, read the article. Read about her. There’s a part where it says they were giving her books to study up on. And they came back and said, did you read any? She said, No, I haven’t looked at the books. I’m just reading the e-mails from my prayer warriors. Prayer warriors. These are people — and she’s one of them — who believe there are demons in the world. Everything in her world view is about demons or angels, people who are with us and people who are against us. You know, when liberals say things like, well, when you fight the mosque, building the mosque in New York, you’re just encouraging a war with Islam, they don’t understand, people like Sarah Palin want a war with Islam. That’s what it says in the Bible. Bring it on. Let’s get it over with. That’s who could be running our country in four years — two years.

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On CNN, Bill Maher Says Tea Party Has ‘No Policy Points,’ Obama Has No Domestic Terror on His Watch

Major Theater Chain Breaks ‘No Unrated Films’ Policy This October

In an unprecedented move, AMC theaters have agreed to play the unrated version of Hatchet 2 this October, breaking with the chain’s long-running refusal to play NC-17 or unrated films. A week later the remake of I Spit on Your Grave will also go out unrated. Until now, major movie theater chains haven’t budged on this policy, which meant that studios for the most part refused to fund movies that might not get an R-rating. Could this move usher in a new era where American filmmakers aren’t afraid to make explicit movies for adults?

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Major Theater Chain Breaks ‘No Unrated Films’ Policy This October

Taylor Swift’s VMA Ballad ‘Innocent’ Divides MTV Readers

‘The song has a nice melody, but I’m starting to think that this was a little overdramatic,’ one fan writes. By James Dinh Taylor Swift performs at the 2010 VMAs Photo: John Shearer/ Wireimage.com Taylor Swift is known for using her real-life experiences as inspiration for her music, so when the singer took the VMA stage to debut her ballad “Innocent” — about someone who has briefly lost their way — the song of course left many thinking it was an ode to Kanye West . But MTV News readers are expressing mixed reactions to the track. “I don’t think that this song was put out there to humiliate Kanye,” commenter Shana said. Calling the singer’s performance “classy,” Shana added that “Innocent” is a sign of Swift’s maturity. “I don’t think this song was showing any sign of Taylor not being able to move on. I think she wanted people to know that we’re all human and she feels the same way about Kanye.” Another fan, Domi, said it wasn’t fair that Swift is getting flak for indirectly addressing last year’s event when Kanye did the same thing at the awards show : “All She Did Was Sing a Song. People Are Still Making Jokes About It. So If You’re Going To Say Something About Her Letting It Go.. Make Sure You Talk AboutEveryone Else Who Has Also Failed To Do So. Or Risk Serious Hypocrisy.” Other fans thought the song was to be expected from an artist like Swift who is known for writing about the boys in her life who have done her wrong. “I thought it was brilliant,” Kekoa wrote. “They said it in her intro. Her music is taken out of the pages of her diary. I mean, did people honestly not see this coming? The song itself is so powerful. She’s showing a maturity beyond her years.” But others weren’t too pleased with the singer rehashing 2009’s headline-making event. “The song has a nice melody, but I’m starting to think that this was a little overdramatic,” bxjam said. Fan Dustin said he understood Swift’s need to sing about her life experiences, but thought her performance intro — Swift replayed a montage of her now-infamous interruption — was just too much. “I get that she would write a song about the VMAs incident, but showing the clip of the incident from last year just made me smh,” he said. “I mean it was last year for crying out loud, get over it.” Swift’s “Innocent” drew criticism for its lyrical content, but also for another topic that had fans talking earlier this year : her vocal abilities. “I don’t have anything against the girl, but it seems like every time I see a Taylor Swift live performance she’s unable to carry a tune 100 percent. She did OK this year, but she was undoubtedly off-key at several moments through her performance,” Brian wrote. Another MTV commenter said the country/pop star needs to move on. “Kanye did address his mistakes but he really rose above all that drama and proved, once again, his greatness. So, people think that Taylor showed maturity, but she really showed immaturity by even addressing it at all. Either way, both did great, let’s move on.” Although Swift has yet to directly confirm that “Innocent” is about Kanye, she seemed intent on getting the song’s message across. She took to her official website after the performance to post the song’s official lyrics after high demand from fans. “A lot of you have been asking about the lyrics to ‘Innocent,’ so here they are. Love, Taylor,” she wrote . Share your thoughts on Taylor’s new song in the comments! The Moonmen have all been handed out and the stars have gone home, but there’s plenty of MTV Video Music Awards news, interviews, behind-the-scenes scoop, party reports and more still to come, so keep it locked on MTVNews.com. Related Videos VMA 2010: The Entire Show On Demand VMA All Access Related Photos VMA 2010: Performers Related Artists Taylor Swift

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Taylor Swift’s VMA Ballad ‘Innocent’ Divides MTV Readers

Victoria Silvstedt Stretches Out Her tight Body

I’m not really use to seeing Victoria Silvstedt do anything other than hang out on some rich old dudes yacht in her little bikini , so I’m a little thrown by these shots of her stretching out her tight body in a field somewhere. I have no idea where she is, it looks like a vacant lot, but I like what she’s trying to do here, if hot women want to stretch in public this is exactly the kind of outfit they should have to wear. A hot girl stretching uniform. Call your congressman.

Audrina Patridge Dancing With The Boobs

Here’s Audrina Patridge leaving another fake boobie filled rehearsal for the new season of Dancing With The Stars . I’m still not sure if I’m going to watch this crap, I don’t think I can sit through it, I want to see her ‘talents’ bouncing around the stage in sexy outfits, but I don’t want to have to watch or listen to anything that has to do with Dancing With The Stars . It’s quite a dilemma. Can I program my Tivo to record her with the sound off in slow motion? I need a nerd.

Essential Killing: Dear Vincent Gallo, Why Do You Torment Me So?

Oh, Vincent Gallo! There’s no escaping you. You follow me from continent to continent, from festival to festival. Last week, in Venice, I saw your strange little picture Promises Written in Water (also playing here in Toronto), and while I wasn’t wowed, I couldn’t quite dismiss it, either. But while in Venice, I missed Polish filmmaker Jerzy Skolimowski’s Essential Killing, which netted you the Best Actor award there — in fact, you’ve got pretty much the only role, aside from Emmanuelle Seigner, who appears very late in the picture. So today in Toronto, I decided to check out Essential Killing. I needed to see for myself if you really deserved that award, you scalawag, you.

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Essential Killing: Dear Vincent Gallo, Why Do You Torment Me So?

Al Pacino, Joe Pesci May Join De Niro/Scorsese’s ‘The Irishman’

Actors are reportedly considering roles in movie about mob assassin Frank “The Irishman” Sheeran. By Adam Rosenberg Al Pacino Photo: Ethan Miller/ Getty Images Robert De Niro is re-teaming with “Goodfellas” and “Casino” director Martin Scorsese for a project that is equal parts mob movie and Federico Fellini-inspired dream reality. Called “The Irishman” and based on the book “I Heard You Paint Houses,” De Niro told MTV’s Josh Horowitz in April that some plans were cooking to perhaps divide the film into two parts. There’s been no additional news on that front, but the project is inching closer to reality with today’s possible casting news. Al Pacino and Joe Pesci are reportedly “circling” roles in “The Irishman,” according to a Deadline report. Scorsese is currently working on the 3-D film “Hugo Cabret,” starring Chloe Moretz, Jude Law, Emily Mortimer and Ben Kingsley. “Irishman” is one of several possible projects he could move on to next. The book “I Heard You Paint Houses” focuses on the life of mob assassin Frank “The Irishman” Sheeran, the supposed killer of Jimmy Hoffa and Joe Gallo. The movie’s script comes from Steve Zaillian, though De Niro told MTV in April that Eric Roth (“The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”) is writing as well, for the potential two-film idea. In De Niro’s words: “We have a more ambitious idea, hopefully, to make it a two-part type of film or two films. It’s an idea that came about from Eric Roth to combine these movies using the footage from ‘Paint Houses’ to do another kind of a [film that is] reminiscent of a kind of ‘8 1/2,’ ‘La Dolce Vita,’ [a] certain kind of biographical, semi-biographical type of Hollywood movie — a director and the actor — based on things Marty and I have experienced and kind of overlapping them.” “La Dolce Vita” and “8 1/2” are works of the late, great Italian filmmaker, Federico Fellini. The latter film is a semi-autobiographical work about a director who is laboring over an elaborate sci-fi production. The story is peppered with flashbacks and dreamscapes that enter into the director’s present-day reality. MTV speculated in April that a similar plan could be in the works with Roth, particularly given the long history of mob films that Scorsese and De Niro have done together. Pacino and De Niro have teamed before, for Michael Mann’s “Heat” and Jon Avent’s “Righteous Kill.” Pesci and De Niro have worked together as well, with Scorsese, on the classics “Goodfellas,” “Casino” and “Raging Bull.” “The Irishman” would mark the first time the foursome have worked together in one movie. For breaking news, celebrity columns, humor and more — updated around the clock — visit MTVMoviesBlog.com . Related Videos MTV Rough Cut: Robert De Niro

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Al Pacino, Joe Pesci May Join De Niro/Scorsese’s ‘The Irishman’

Jay-Z, Eminem Joined By Kanye West, Beyonce More At Yankee Stadium

Drake, Chris Martin, Nicki Minaj also appear at first New York stop of Home and Home tour. By Shaheem Reid Eminem and Jay-Z perform at Yankee Stadium on Monday Photo: Kevin Mazur/ WireImage NEW YORK — A year ago, Jay-Z showed why he’s music’s Emperor of the Empire State with a historic charity concert at Madison Square Garden , which Jay called “the house that Hovie built.” On Monday night, “the God MC” took his mastery of performance to the front stoop of Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez, Yankee Stadium. And because that’s no setting in which to go small, he brought out special guests like Kanye West, Drake, Chris Martin, Swizz Beatz, Nicki Minaj and, of course, Beyonc#233;. After kicking off in Detroit two weeks ago, Jay and Eminem’s Home and Home concerts landed on the Jiggaman’s soil for shows on Monday and Tuesday (September 14). This time, after J. Cole opened , Slim Shady shook the stadium in the second slot, with special guests the G-Unit and Dr. Dre. Then Jay took over with a bevy of surprises and a catalog of hard-line hits. “Before I start this piece, let me say, rest in peace to the boss, George [Steinbrenner],” Hov began, freestyling a reference to the late Yankees owner after commencing his program with the “Dynasty Intro.” “By the time we sliding home/ I hope we playing in the dome,” he continued rapping. During “Run This Town,” Jay asked, “Where you at, boy?” And out came 2010 VMA closer Kanye West in a red suit. The roar was thunderous for the Louis Vuitton Don, who also rocked a huge gold link chain. They followed up with the first live performance of the “Power” remix — where all 50,000-plus people did the soulful “power clap” — and “Monster.” There was no Rick Ross on the latter, but ‘Ye and Hov brought out Nicki Minaj, who was showered with love from her hometown. Hov said that since they were in New York, he couldn’t let Kanye off the hook that easy. West told the audience he was going to “take them back.” The Chicago-born icon then crushed the concert with “Can’t Tell Me Nothing” and a follow-up haymaker of the stadium friendly “Good Life.” “It’s one of the most unbelievable feelings in the world, being from New York and being in Yankee stadium,” Jay said about the night. “That’s how you feel, New York City?” Hov continued, in response to the crowd’s overwhelming cheers. “New York City, is that how you feel tonight? I can’t believe this sh–!” Jay’s next guest was Bronx native Swizz Beatz, who was also celebrating his birthday. What a present! Further along in his set list, Jay rolled out his jaw-dropping verse from “Free Mason.” Like in most of shows, the Jiggaman constantly spoke to the crowd. “Just because you question religion doesn’t mean you don’t believe in God,” he said after his rumor-admonishing verse. “Don’t let anybody scare you into having their beliefs. Be a muthaf—in- renegade.” Out came Eminem for their classic colossal meeting of the minds. No matter how many times they perform the track, it’s still surreal to see the two biggest names in rap stand unified, side by side. Memphis Bleek then came out for a parade of familiar Jay knockers, including “U Don’t Know,” “99 Problems” and “Big Pimpin’.” There was a tribute to hip-hop’s passed away greats that included B.I.G., D12’s Proof, Pimp C and Tupac Shakur. Monday was the 14th anniversary of Pac’s tragic death. Chris Martin from Coldplay came out to sing the hook on “Heart of the City.” Martin was crisp and soulful on the mic. Jay kicked the graceful lines to “Most Kingz,” and then Martin took the energy up a few levels with “Viva la Vida.” “I used to rule the world,” the crowd sang. “Seas would rise/ When I gave the word/ Now in the morning I sleep alone/ Sweep the streets I used to own/ I used to roll the dice/ Feel the fear in my enemy’s eyes.” Hov then told his DJ to throw on any song, and out came Drake for “Miss Me.” “Tellllllll me/ What’s really going / Drizzy back up in this bitch/ What’s happenin!!!” Drake came on rapping. The approval for the 23-year-old was vibrant. “Say, ‘Free Weezy!’ ” Drake commanded during Lil Wayne’s verse. Jay and Drizzy then let the mics explode with “Light Up.” Not letting the audience catch their breath, Beyonc

NYT’s Deadpan Howler: ‘Lawmakers Were Apparently Unaware’ of New ObamaCare 1099 Requirements

New York Times reporter Robert Pear ought to consider moonlighting as a stand-up comic in the tradition of Steven Wright . Wright’s deadpan delivery is legendary. Pear’s deadpan lines in his article about the immense paperwork burden heading the economy’s way in the form of requiring IRS 1099 forms to be issued to each and every person paid $600 or more during the course of a calendar year for any and all goods provided or services rendered are remarkable. Of course, if Pear chooses to get on stage with his act he’ll have to come up with a more humorous topic. The nightmare that could be visited upon American business and really the American economy is pretty stunning — and don’t for a minute think that individuals with hobbies that break even or possibly lose money every year and don’t ordinarily bother to file tax returns for their activities (because they aren’t required to) aren’t going to be affected. What follows are a few of the choice one-liners found in Pear’s September 11 article (“Many Push for Repeal of Tax Provision in Health Law”) that appeared in the paper’s Sunday print edition on Page A25: The reporting requirement is expected to lead to a significant amount of revenue — $17 billion over 10 years — to help pay for the expansion of coverage and other health initiatives. I told you this guy Pear is a laugh riot. He actually expects readers to believe that businesses will spent untold millions on forms, postage, and handling of literally hundreds of millions and possibly billions of 1099 forms but will, even though these costs are fully deductible, still have to fork over $1.7 billion more every year in personal and corporate income taxes. In reality, where Pear, the Times, and Washington’s lawmakers clearly don’t live, the amount collected after considering the effect of the extra costs imposed will necessarily be much less, and could conceivably be a big fat zero. (the 1099 reporting provision) drew little attention at the time — it was one of more than 15 revenue-raising measures in the bill — and many lawmakers were apparently unaware of it when they voted for final passage of the legislation. Wow, is this guy a master of understatement or what? Surely a reporter of Mr. Pear’s pedigree will recall that Nancy Pelosi infamously said just weeks before the bill’s final passage that “… we have to pass the bill so that you can find out what is in it.” Robert Pear, New York Times reporter extraordinaire, know that “many lawmakers were apparently unaware of it when they voted for final passage” because they were directly unaware of anything in the bill. Why? Because they never read it, period. Pear had help with the final howler I’ll cite from Nina Olson, national taxpayer advocate at the IRS, whom the New York Times reporter should consider taking on as a standup sidekick: “The I.R.S. will face challenges making productive use of this new volume of information reports,” Ms. Olson said. “Challenges?” Shoot, they’ll have to rent hundreds of thousands of square feet of office space just to accommodate the tidal wave of incoming paper, find a server farm to store the data that comes in electronically, and employ and army of people to enter the data and sift through it. Seriously, the fact that Congress even has to engage in the exercise of repeal shows how derelict those who voted for ObamaCare sight unseen really were. That’s not funny, and that the topic deserved a more informative treatment by the Times should be, well ap-Pear-ent. A related post is at BizzyBlog.com .

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NYT’s Deadpan Howler: ‘Lawmakers Were Apparently Unaware’ of New ObamaCare 1099 Requirements